Sunday, August 28, 2005

All Blacks v. Springboks and an exploration of Janet Frame that just kept going, finished up with bubbliness

Another entry well overdue - hi Dad! The rugby last night was amazing, the kind of game that gets rave write-ups in the newspaper (almost 4 pages total in the Otago Daily Times) and cliche after cliche from those oh-so-familiar announcers. "The game to end all games!"
Look up - Rokocoko is baaaaaack!

On a different note (some more thoughts of mine, the kind that pop) I recently read a book of poems by a woman called Janet Frame. Most people overseas won't have heard of her, but here in New Zealand she's a cultural icon. The thing is - and this is what surprised me - her poems and thoughts are deeply negative. Cherry blossoms are bloody, the weather oppressive, cold, lonely and neglected. Any images that could maybe have had a positive spin - like that of Dunedin before it's discovery by British settlers - were always smothered by sadness or morbidity. It almost seemed like her inner joy was being denied. All the things I associated Janet Frame with before this were rural schools, derelict wooden houses, large families, threadbare clothes... It seems really sad that that kind of life produced someone with such a twisted sense of reality. Here's an example, maybe more justifiable than some (why I feel the need to justify it is another matter, lol), of a child dying of leukemia, 2nd and 3rd verses.

... who for six months has lain
his flesh at a touch bruised violet,
his face pale, his hate clearer
than milky love that would smooth over
the pebbles of diseased bone.

Pain spangles him like the sun,
He cries and cannot say why.
His blood blossoms like a pear tree.
He does not want to eat or keep
it's ugly windfall fruit.
I first read this particular poem last year in 4th form English, and then it had a weird, disquieting effect on me. Most probably this came simply from the subject, and not the language... but that same tone is evident in other poems, as well. This is from 'The Sun Shines All Day Vulgarly":

None told me that the sun would stay,
the cherry blossom wither and die,
and when its bloom was shed, the tree
cast off its guise of purity,
embrace light in its common mood
- wear a dark dress of blood.
Even now, thinking about it, I'm feeling uncomfortable. Naivety, perhaps - I hope - as that's definitely something to celebrate. (Does being aware of naivety wipe out its existence?)
My English teacher, when he gave me that book, said "poems are food for the soul." It's true, but sometimes verses like that take a bit of swallowing. They make me long for "The Far-Away Horse."
-
The NZ Idols are doing Wham. "Wake me up before you go-go!" There's always some balance, isn't there? Incidentally, George Michael's pants in that video are waaaaay too tight. ^ - ^
*glances back at the tv* Ahhh! That's absurd!!!! 20-something men and women wearing leg-warmers and singing duncy 80's pop... and actually getting into it. Makes me smile, lol. Idol cheese is definitely big in NZ. *shakes head in bemusement* Oh, who am I to talk? American Idol 2 claimed my head for about a year - go Clay!

Tuesday, August 16, 2005


A damn fine picture made by my sister - no copying! ^ - ^

A prayer to Bobby Jon

Hey - I fell over some empty minutes and thought I'd do some updating. We have lights in our kitchen again! No more banging into tables for me... and I'd say the risk of fire will be somewhat reduced now that the electrical cords are away from the sink.
Bobby Jon. What a name. Maybe a little slow, that man - but then again, he's not the one watching TV3 on mute because the reception's screwed up. *slaps self* We should have it soon. Steadily, every little problem in this house is getting fixed.
My sister Jessie has reintroduced me to RPGs! Beqanna would have to be one of the best you'd find: not too intimidating, tons of activity, and great graphics. Oh, they're horses, btw. If you want people, go somewhere else. (Elves, I can do. Ablithora
looks good, is up-and-coming, but not totally checked out yet. Okay, I confess, I only just found it - but it could be fantastic! It could! :-)
Enough writing? Definitely enough rambling. I think I'm done. Go All Blacks!!!!!

Thursday, August 11, 2005


The Port of Lyttelton in Banks Peninsula, Canterbury


Max Shreck as Dracula in 'Nosferatu' (1922), one of the creepiest films you should ever see.

History


Castle Duffus in Scotland, owned by my family in centuries past

I knew I had to record the books I've read somehow, because there have been so many I don't remember, that I no longer think about; their influence shouldn't be ended so easily.

Finished books:
Sun After Dark - Pico Iyer (Nov '05)
Gorgeous, thought-provoking, insightful. The best travel book I've ever read, and what has now made the author one of my writing icons. :-)
Sarum - Edward Rutherfurd (Dec '05)
Many, many different characters woven together with amazingly palatable craftsmanship. A solid, traditionally well-written story that goes down easy, taking advantage of the ever-changing history of one of Britain's most ancient population centres.
The Little Friend - Donna Tartt (Dec '05)
Finished, and with a strange, melancholy feeling. Shards of effective and descriptive writing remain with me, and a sense of the torture in Harriet's dark eyes.
The Little Friend makes you think. It's a wonderful book, full of prose that makes you feel like you're there and gives the whole thing an uncommon sense of reality, a disquieting frankness... It seems as though Donna Tartt writes things as they are, describing the distinct impressions they give with minimal input from muddying cliches. My mind recalls scenes as if inside them, each little line picked up and stored within my memory as a stir to achieve that particular kind of clarity.
[ Alexander the Great: The Hunt for a New Past - Paul Cartledge ]
Overdue back at the library. I never did get through it, and I don't feel I'm missing much: the style was too dry, too detached for me to get interested even though history books usually have some sort of allure to me.
The French Lieutenant's Woman - John Fowles (Dec '05)
About the story: it's melancholy, unrelenting and beautiful, a treat to read despite an ending which may seem cruel to us romantics. I found it drew my consideration, made me think; it calls all your attention, all your powers of observation and thought.
Game of Thrones, Clash of Kings & A Storm of Swords - George R.R. Martin (Dec '05 / Jan '06)
(Three books within the 'Song of Ice & Fire' series)
Fantasy. Good fantasy, the involved, well-written, epic kind. Reading for the second time I'd almost forgotten how dark they seemed, but despite the almost inevitable fact that 4/5 of the characters you like will die it's an amazingly easy story to lose yourself in: a complete other world, detailed, compelling and vivid. The reader moves from the narrative of one character to the next with seductive ease, each chapter infused with a distinctive personality that is testament to the talent of the author. The mood is never far from realistic, by turns bitter, naive, determined and distraught. I loved it.
The Death of an Ancient King - Laurent Gaude (Jan '06)
Written in a slightly otherworldy, ethereal and simplistic style, like the fables of old, this story is haunting and beautiful. It tells of a dying king whose kingdom is ripped apart by war between his loved ones, an eerie reminder of the fallibilities of the human mind that can cause such damage while believing the acts justified.
Fleur-de-Lis - Isolde Martyn (Jan '06)
Sweet, hard to follow yet irresistible, I have a feeling this may just be a girls' novel. The handsome men are there in all their glory and the heroine is witty and charismatic. Their interactions take place against the uncertainty of post-revolution Paris, but the murderousness and brutality of the time are seldom allowed to intrude.
The Dark of the Sun - Chelsea Quinn Yarbro (Jan '06)
Wonderul! Clear, crisp, and captivating... Like a frost, each sentence worth its weight. Not your typical vampire novel, not at all - its hero is a hero, Saint-Germain, the most noble of beings, elegant and gracious beyond my powers to describe... Goddamn this book is good!!!
River Thieves - Michael Crummey (Jan '06)
A realistic, talented depiction of life in the snow and ice of Newfoundland, with just the slightest supporting touch of cynicism.
Tropical Classical - Pico Iyer (Jan '06)
This author is one of those I most admire, blessed with warmth, disarming humour and a wonderfully engaging style.
Knife of Dreams - Robert Jordan (Feb '06)
Fantasy. Perhaps simpler than George Martin's work (in style, though not content), more familiar, less cruel - and amazingly addictive. This book continues the tradition, beautifully crafted and readable... Must have more...
The Dead - James Joyce (Feb '06)
He's talented, I'd always known, but before now I hadn't realised how much humanity accompanied the wit and intelligence. This is a beautiful short story, biting and melancholy but gently sensitive.
The General in his Labyrinth - Gabriel Garcia Marquez (Feb '06)
This book for me is a lot more compassionate than One Hundred Years of Solitude, and though the imagery in that tale was breath-taking, this was easier to get into. Perhaps it is the borderless theme of age and failing strength, perhaps the bare character of the General himself - but something makes it closer and more personal than the expansive canvas of his more well-known texts.
Vainglory - Geraldine McCaughrean (April '06)
A tale of the noble family of Gloriole and their heritage, the chateau of Gloriole-sur-Sablois, through the uprisings of Renaissance France. The first, Victoire, I loved, because he was all that a lord should be - but fortunes fell. This is a book rich in human shortcomings, cultured and brutal, but a very interesting one.
The Silent - Jack Dann (April '06)
A civil war drama told through the eyes of a child. It's mystical and disturbing, the stark horror of battle and loss forced from reality to a nightmarish haze which tortures the mind of the young boy caught within.
The Wolf King - Alice Borchardt (May '06)
This is good story-telling. Werewolves, but not so bleakly drawn, and Charlemagne!
The Tale of Murasaki - Liza Dalby (June '06)
Fascinating. I curled up with this book in the sun for hours at a time, just reading. The locations, the people, the legends come alive in your mind; the language is compelling, exotic and graceful. It's quite simply a gorgeous story.
Autumn Bridge - Takashi Matsuoka (July '06)
A tale that reaches for beauty, decorated as finely as any ancient tapestry, intricate, delicate and long-lasting. Its clever positioning of time and place gently entwine the reader, draping your world in thin silky gauze; each character is mythic in their own way, as Viking heroes of old, and yet we see their flaws. Very good.
A Thread of Grace - Mary Doria Russell (September '06)
Magical and harrowing. It's somehow true, somehow distant, and somehow taking place before either your eyes or the eyes of a you that could have been. (Obviously it inspires abstract thought.) The character of Renzo in particular is stunningly drawn, charismatic, 'mercurial' in the words of the blurb, and though I found myself affected by his depression I was also full of admiration for him, Santino, and Claudia. A Thread of Grace is beautifully written, captivating, and worthwhile: it's the book that pulled me back into reading.
Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden (September '06)
I stayed up all night reading this one. That's how good it is. A complete journey through life, one told with skill by a woman endlessly interesting. Towards the end you begin to squirm, as desperation grows - but... well, I'm not going to tell you everything am I? Just give it a go, especially if, like me, you're on a high for everything Japanese.
Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks (September '06)
Yay!!! This is the reaction provoked by a story told with a beauty I hadn't imagined possible, earth-shattering, mournful; it's an anthem for the losses of war, for the losses of love, for redemption and continuing life. If ever a book was to change your attitude forever, this is quite likely it. Read it for your sanity. Read it for emotion and a deeper appreciation. Read it to keep in your mind the tragic beauty of all that we have.
Augusta Locke - William Haywood Henderson (September '06)
This story has its own ambience, its own luscious sense of place and time... Seldom has a book been so distinctive. You can truly sense the heat, the dust and dry of the American outback; feel as your own Augusta's (figurative) claustrophobia, her fear of losing her daughter and dissociation from those who love her. As stilted as it sounds, this is a real journey.
Naked Empire - Terry Goodkind (September '06)
These are the books I devour. They're so captivating, so interesting, that I can't take my eyes away for more than a few minutes. This one took me... oh, around a day. I just wish it was longer! The words flow through you so naturally you hardly even need to form a conscious thought, getting carried away into another world to wonder at the sights being played out before your eyes.
Brethren - Robyn Young (September '06)
Crusades. How can it not be good? Thought not the deepest I've ever read, it's well-written and I'm looking forward to the next one. The Knights Templar, in particular, are treated with an interesting, matter-of-fact sense that heightens their strangeness to us now. Oh, and there's a plot, and a secret society. Yeah, it's good.
The Entire World of Time Series - Robert Jordan (Dec '06 - Jan '07)
That's around... 12,000 pages. They are amazing: both my sister and I dove in. I don't know if I'm capable of explaining what makes them so enthralling, but a taste might do:
- "The Wheel of Time turns, and Ages come and pass, leaving memories that become legend. Legend fades to myth, and even myth is long forgotten when the Age that gave it birth comes again. In one Age, called the Third Age by some, a wind rose among brown-thicketed hills in Cairhien. The wind was not the beginning. There are neither beginnings nor endings to the turning of the Wheel of Time. But it was a beginning."
[From the first chapter of Lord of Chaos, book six.] Another taste, from a random page: 800, actually.
- "In the evening Myrelle spoke to him again about becoming a Warder, and went a little tight around the eyes when he told her hers would be the fifth offer he had refused since sunup. He was not sure she believed him: she flounced off in as much of a huff as he'd ever seen from an Aes Sedai."
Or page 362:
- "Suddenly Nicola spoke, sounding half-asleep. 'The lion sword, the dedicated spear, she who sees beyond. Three on the boat, and he who is dead yet lives.'" Ah, copying is addictive... Almost as addictive as these books in the first place. If you haven't tried, you must. Do yourself a favour, expand your horizons, and get beautifully intoxicated with this comprehensive other world.
The Bone People - Keri Hulme (March/April '07)
Wow. Now that is not the kind of book to make you feel better about humanity - in fact, if it'd been my choice, it would have been abandoned half-way through. But no, school has its demands... Cruel, pretentious, raw, a job to get your head around. Why do I want
my head around this?
The Aeneid - Virgil (April '07)
Much of the power I find in this can be attributed to my Classics teacher. He, for me, brings it alive. He imbues each word with the strength its author intended, deepening, illuminating for us all the subtleties and music in this wonderfully written and ancient work. Through him, we understand Virgil's depiction of 'the terrible iron-constricted Gates of War': we see Aeneas's journey from battle-hungry, honour-seeking Homeric hero to a constructive individual epitomizing the Roman ideal of sacrificing yourself for your city.
City of the Beasts - Isabel Allende (April '07)
Huh. I would have loved this a few years ago (when phrases such as "... her grandson commented, unable to suppress a hint of mockery when he saw his grandmother believed such tales" didn't make me grit my teeth - ah, such a snob). It's the kind of book I could never find: vivid, exotic, magical, moral. Very well-written.
Like Water for Chocolate - Laura Esquivel (June '07)
Light, fantastic, romantic: easily readable, sweet, and justifiably popular. Beautiful imagery accompanies a sensitive portrayal of human passion and belief.
Slaughterhouse-Five - Kurt Vonnegut (June '07)
I can hear my teacher's voice in this. Despite the deadpan description of death (a critical part of this novel, and an issue addressed by a rather circuitous notion of time), there is deep sympathy here. Empathetic, complex, unnerving in parts with a varied and choppy structure, this was a rewarding read.
The Iron Lance - Stephen Lawhead (July '07)
This is good. Apart from the inevitable cruelty and destruction brought by religious war (so much more to say here...) and my personal atheism, this drew me in wonderfully. In comparison with Byzantium, also by this author (and which I've tried and failed to finish at least three times) this is a great success: flowing, involving, heart-warming and sickening by turns. Not a power-punch to the gut, but surprisingly vivid and full of fascinating history.
Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov (September '07)
This man awes me. I've begun reading his autobiography, Speak, Memory, before, but never had the time to finish... and the loss is too much to describe. His words are so rich, so powerful, so- so much beyond, beyond, beyond! Read it now.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - J.K. Rowling (September '07)
Yes, these books are... what? Addictive? Obviously. The fact that I can plough through them is one that hardly needs to be mentioned, because that's their great strength: the ability to take hold of your thought, to create a seamless story that glides along so smoothly that before you realise, you're 100, 200, 300 pages in. (Part of that might also be the irritatingly large font size. :P) Redemption was big in this one. I liked that. There were beautiful moments, some hopelessly sad: there was death, love and much courage. Surprisingly emotive, and most definitely a fitting ending for this record-breaking series.
[ Gabriela, Clove and Cinnamon ] - Jorge Amado (October '07)
Very interesting so far: exotic, dry, human, somehow abstracted and an undeniable salvation.
When the Emperor was Divine - Julie Otsuka (October '07)
Fragile, perceptive, heart-breaking. This connects so easily, and wounds so deeply and so well: as an account of the isolation felt by Japanese Americans during WWII, a narrative of the journey of one family as they spend years in a cramped refugee camp in Utah, it captivates; as thought, it seems to crystallize a profound piece of the human spirit.

[and here we have one of those lamentable slips - I did keep a log of what I read, but on paper, somewhere... and even 'somewhere' is half a world away at this moment.]

Invisible Cities - Italo Calvino (mid '07)
It's been nearly a year since I first read this, so I'll try to capture some of the exhiliration I felt all those months ago: Invisible Cities is a poignant, insightful and life-affirming book. Within each story there is layer upon layer of meaning, lyrical and delicate, a wealth of detail and breath-taking accuracy. It's magical.
[ The Castle of Otranto ] - Horace Walpole (July '08)
Gothic, unsettling in the way of unruly superstition; complex in its language yet with the strange, echoing ring of a fairy tale. Combinations of lack of time and lack of motivation led me to return this before I'd finished, and though there were flashes of light - I remember dimly a princess' flight through a darkened castle, a village boy defending her to an angered lord - the story as a whole was too brutal to make enjoyable reading. For me, anyway. ^^
Diamond Warriors - David Zindell (July '08)
Ironic that brutality in this form is so easily tolerated; but then what I liked most about this book was it's spirituality. It was a hymn to the strength of the human heart, even crowded with magic, swords, knightly codes of honour and earth-bound immortals. Real beauty was described, in character and actions. Now I just have to find the first three books in the series!
The Time Traveller's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger (August '08)
The blurbs call this book 'reckless', and I think that suits it well. It's crammed with chaotic beauty, courage and epic love - yet somehow, there's such truth to this. It reads close to the bone, as raw and illogical as human emotion itself.
The Testament of Gideon Mack - James Patterson (August '08)
Engrossing. I'm finding myself staying up late to read, something that hasn't happened in a while. It's a bit off-kilter, but so achingly human.
The Wars of the Roses: Lancaster and York - Alison Weir (Sept '08)
When I first saw this sitting on the arm of the sofa in Northampton, England, it mocked me. See, I didn't think I'd get to read it. But then my host surprised me, and so... It's a book of huge scope and passion, with an intellectual bent that came like a breath of fresh air and an amazing way of portraying character. The best kind of history, I think: scholarly, but never forgetting the essential humanity within all those shadowy figures of the past.
It is Bliss Here: Letters Homes, 1939 - 1945 - Myles Hildyard (Sept '08)
This book follows a British soldier through six years of service in Greece, the Middle East and France. It's introspective and seems to carry a real emotional honesty, though the author's words can be scarce when he's not describing the ancient wonders of the lands around him.
The Jackal of Nar, The Grand Design & The Saints of the Sword - John Marco (Oct '08)
(Three books within the 'Tyrants and Kings' trilogy)
Harsh, compelling and very readable. It captured my imagination, and even now, weeks after finishing, I can conjure scenes in my head: battles at sea, a palace gate like an upturned waterfall, the industrial might of Nar City. This is grand as the best fantasy is grand, a true gateway to another world.
The History of God - Karen Armstrong (Oct '08)
I don't feel any review could do this book justice. Her topic is some of the most brilliant and vibrant thinking of any age, and yet she analyses and explores it masterfully. 

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Mount Hutt, in the Southern Alps of New Zealand - not quite Neptune, but damn gorgeous nonetheless ^ - ^

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Loss of Words

Matthew Brannon
Loss of Words
website

º Text, huh? Tapping fingers seem more appropriate.
The 'Ready Steady Cook' chefs grace the television; interesting how cheesy smiles penetrate those pixels so well. Mountain hairdo's are in style... How much do humans want freedom from this? To be lying on a beach in the sun, drinking something tropical and cold - or sitting in front of a warm fire, watching shadows dance over the walls - or marveling at the wonders of an ancient cathedral in Italy, France or Turkey - even standing in the wind on a grass-covered hill with not another human being in sight - all these dreams seem far more attractive and far more distant.

Friday, August 05, 2005

A Birthday and Cezanne

Hey world: it's me again. How's Earth? Apparently Neptune is very dark. Our naughty space-dogs are barking their heads off and irritating the neighbours... well, those neighbours that haven't gone deaf, anyway.
I'm 16 now! It was my birthday on the 3rd, and I got an awful (hang on - chocolate, awful? Let me say 'a very great') lot of chocolate. My friend even baked a chocolate cake and brought it to school for me, and we had jelly crystals! It was great.
^ - ^ Great great great! The only bad thing happened to be that when you eat jelly crystals (we didn't have too much, though, because they wind you up very easily, lol) off your fingers, the skin turns the same colour. I managed to warn everyone else but forgot about it myself, brainiac that I am. :-)
Hmmmm, interesting insights. You know what? I'm a 16-year-old girl, I haven't experienced anything much in my life save the depressingly common chill of divorce, and I honestly haven't had the freedom to make stupid mistakes. Any insights I might have (well, do have - if you can call them that) wouldn't really be stemming from personal experience, or knowledge of how the world works, or anything like that. They'd be hopelessly naive, drawn only from my judgements on the fairly harmless world I live in. It's impossible that I could understand the lives and struggles of so many of the people in this world... but I'm gonna try!
Forgive my blundering, because hopefully these thoughts of mine will improve with practice. ^ - ^
I've got to make the most of this youthful enthusiasm while I still have it: that's a lesson learned from my grandparents, one of the rare complete truths I've heard. Youth may still be wasted on me, but I aim to make the most of it. Spain, here I come!
Oh, and the painting is by Cezanne, one of many of
Mont Sainte-Victoire in France. (See more work by him.) I love it - impressionism seems to speak straight to the mysteries of human perception. Maybe it's too girly, this view, but I think of art as something which conjours up human emotion. I know others don't agree with me - Dad - but I just thought I'd say it. :-) I'm almost of time, lol, have been typing for too long. Have a great day, guys, and thanks for reading. ^ - ^